To Rant or Not To Rant...

THAT is the question....lol. So I have actually chosen NOT to rant, however warranted and legitimate that might be right now. SOMEHOW, the Universe is getting through to my spirit often enough and/or when it really matters and is helping me with strength to keep going - and going, and going..

I used to say that I had "energizer bunny power" because I could just go and go and take care of kids and not fall apart and do what needed to get done. Then I thought that I had lost that ability - I got older, I got more tired, had more physical and mental health issues that interfered. But. In a different way, I seem to be doing it again, miraculously, because I haven't been without meds for this long for a long time.

I just wanna feel well. And function. Some people's brains just need a little help to do that. Like mine.

Maybe I'm not currently in my right mind, but it almost feels like I'm being given the opportunity for a new start - maybe I am learning strategies what will help me through the apocalypse! When there will be no meds! :D

Update to this one: I made it through a month and two and a half weeks with no medication. It was pretty much hell. I wish I could make changes to the health care system that would better help others who will find themselves in the same situation to not have to wait so long and endure so much. I did find some hidden gems in hell, though :)

I have learned that I have more power inside me than I thought I did. I have learned that that I can be nice to myself. That there is another voice inside me (besides the mean one) that I can listen to that even - dare I say it, gasp! - loves me! Or, at least, is kind. I experienced, albeit sometimes very painfully at first, that spending time with myself, by myself, actually ISN'T the end of the world. Somehow it contains a key to liking myself in general...

So, though I don't wish my recent mental unhealth experience on anyone, I am, perhaps in a crazy way, grateful for it. Who would of thought.